Wonderful 5 Steps for a Happy Life - Positive Attitude

We all want a happy life, and we all know that having a positive attitude feels better than a negative one. But for some reason, we are all attracted to and can be easily drawn to the negative side. How do we go about to establish a more positive attitude as a daily habit?

Even for someone like me, who thinks about and writes about positivity on an almost daily basis, having a positive attitude is not always easy.

I still sometimes see the world through a negative perspective, focusing on the bad and ignoring the good — especially when things aren’t going the way I had hoped. As I’ve been struggling with this lately, I’ve been reminding myself that it really is possible to change my perspective.

About a year and a half ago, I decided I was going to make a change in my life. I was going to start looking for the good, seeking the positive, and striving to make every day a joyful experience.

This was something I would have never imagined myself doing, but it’s something that has impacted my life every single day since then. I’ve had to do a lot to get to where I am right now, and I still believe I have a long way to go.

I’m not searching for any particular end point, however. All I want is to be happy, to live a life that focuses more on the good than the bad (though I do believe you need both to have a happy life).

On this road — this twisting, turning road to happiness — there have been many ups and downs. There have been challenges. There have been inspirations. There have been many amazing experiences that I never would have had if I had not made the choice to live a positive and happy life.

Recently, as I struggle to be positive about certain challenging situations in my life, I’ve been giving some serious thought to how I transformed my outlook from negative-focused to a more positive-focused one. (Note: I don’t always see the good. Like everyone, I have good days and bad days, but, for the most part, there has been a BIG shift in my attitude over the past year or so).

Though I have to admit that there are many, many factors involved in my personal development — such as my therapist, the countless books and blogs I read, creating my blog, and surrounding myself with happy, supportive people — I can say that, at the most basic level, choosing to be positive has helped me the most in terms of becoming the person I want to be.

When I think back on my transformation now, I recognize that the following five steps are the best ways to begin stumbling down that path to happiness by establishing a habit of positive attitude.

5 Steps to a Happy Life with Positive Attitude

Step 1: Believe Happiness is a Choice

For me, this was a hard one at first. I thought that people were either unhappy or happy (and I was one of the unhappy ones). I used to blame this on all kinds of outside forces –- fate, experiences, parents, relationships –- but never really stopped to think that I could choose to be happy.

Sure, this isn’t always easy, but it is always, always an option. Teaching myself to see that happiness is a choice has been one of the greatest things I’ve ever done for myself.

Now when I find myself in a bad situation, I know that it’s up to me to find the good, to be happy regardless of what’s happening around me. I am no longer pointing fingers, placing blame. I realize that everything happens how it happens and it’s up to me to choose how I want to feel about it. I am in control of my happiness level and no one can take that away from me.

Step 2: Rid Your Life of Negativity

If you want to live a positive, joyful and happy life, you cannot –- absolutely CANNOT -– be surrounded by negative people who are not encouraging your happiness. When I was a pretty negative person, I tended to attract other negative people.

When I decided to make the change to live a more positive life, I had to rid my life of all of the negative people in it. This, as you can imagine, wasn’t easy. Getting rid of people hurts -– even when you know they aren’t good for you or your current lifestyle.

Not only did I have to get rid of the negative people, but I also had to get rid of the negative things too. I had to stop doing certain things that were causing negativity in my life. I had to take a step back and examine which behaviors were good for me and which were not.

I learned to focus on the positive things I was doing and let go of the negative ones. This process was not easy and to be honest, is still ongoing, but I know this: having negativity in your life prevents you from living a truly positive existence.

Step 3: Look For the Positive in Life

There is the positive aspect in everything. In every person, in every situation, there is something good. Most of the time it’s not all that obvious. We have to look. And sometimes we have to look hard.

The old me just sat back and allowed things to happen by default. If I saw negative, I went with that feeling. I didn’t want to look harder or think too much about the good. I found it much, much easier to sit back and just accept what I saw (which was usually the bad).

Now, when I’m faced with a difficult or challenging situation, I think to myself, “What is good about this?” No matter how terrible the situation might seem, I always can find something good if I take the time to think about it.

Everything –- good and bad -– is a learning experience. So, at the very least, you can learn from bad experiences. However, there’s usually even more to it than that. If you really take the time to look, you will usually find something good, something really positive, about every person or situation.

Step 4: Reinforce Positivity in Yourself

Once I started thinking more positively and adapted to a more positive attitude, I realized I had to reinforce these thoughts and behaviors in myself so they would stick. As with any sort of training, practice makes perfect, and, yes, you can practice being positive.

The best and easiest way to do this is to be positive when it comes to who you are. Tell yourself you’re awesome. Tell yourself you look good. Tell yourself that you love and accept yourself completely. Tell yourself you did an awesome job at work or raising your kids or whatever it is you do.

Be honest with yourself, but do your best to look for the good. And, whatever you do, don’t focus on the negative. Nothing good can come of telling yourself that your butt’s too big or your latest career goal wasn’t met.

It’s okay to not like everything about yourself (yet), but don’t spend energy dwelling on the negative. Remind yourself of the good in you. We all have positive attributes and it’s up to you to remind yourself of them every day.

Step 5: Share Happiness with Others

Not only do you need to be positive with yourself for this new positive attitude to really take effect, you also need to be positive with others. You have to share your wealth of positivity with the world.

The best way I’ve found to do this is quite simple and basic: be nice. Be nice to other people, no matter what. Tell someone he or she looks nice today. Tell someone they did a great job on that presentation. Tell your parents or children (or both!) how much you love them and how great they are.

When someone is feeling down, do what you can to cheer him or her up. Send flowers. Write notes. Don’t gossip. Be kind to all living things. All of these things sound basic enough, but, for someone like me, they didn’t used to come easily.

In the past, I didn’t wanted to see the good in myself and, therefore, didn’t want to see it in others either. I used to be critical and condescending. Now I strive to be encouraging and supportive. I try not only to treat others, as I would like to be treated, but also to consider how they would like to be treated.

People appreciate positivity and the more you are sharing it with others, the more you are practicing it and reinforcing it in your own life.

Parting Words on the Positive Attitude Habit

When you start feeling like the idea of being a positive person is daunting, tell yourself this: “If someone who really used to struggle with a negative attitude, turned her life around with these five steps, then I can too!”

If anyone had told me a few years ago that I would be writing an article about developing a positive attitude and living a happy life, I would have laughed right in their face. I would have said, “Why in the world would someone want me to write about positivity?”

But here I am, writing this post, believing in these words, and knowing that every single day I am getting closer and closer to living the happy life I’ve secretly dreamed of living. If I can do it, you can do it. Believe in yourself and remember the most important lesson of all… a positive outlook is a choice. Choose to be positive. Choose to be happy. Life is short.

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Incredible Thing That Determination Can Do. The Power of Determination.

The little country schoolhouse was heated by an old-fashioned, pot-bellied coal stove. A little boy had the job of coming to school early each day to start the fire and warm the room before his teacher and his classmates arrived.

One morning they arrived to find the schoolhouse engulfed in flames. They dragged the unconscious little boy out of the flaming building more deadly than alive. He had major bums over the lower half of his body and was taken to a nearby county hospital.

From his bed the dreadfully burned, semi-conscious little boy faintly heard the doctor talking to his mother. The doctor told his mother that her son would surely die — which was for the best, really — for the terrible fire had devastated the lower half of his body.

But the brave boy didn’t want to die. He made up his mind that he would survive. Somehow, to the amazement of the physician, he did survive. When the mortal danger was past, he again heard the doctor and his mother speaking quietly. The mother was told that since the fire had destroyed so much flesh in the lower part of his body, it would almost be better if he had died, since he was doomed to be a lifetime cripple with no use at all of his lower limbs.

Once more the brave boy made up his mind. He would not be a cripple. He would walk. But unfortunately from the waist down, he had no motor ability. His thin legs just dangled there, all but lifeless.

Ultimately he was released from the hospital. Every day his mother would massage his little legs, but there was no feeling, no control, nothing. Yet his determination that he would walk was as strong as ever.

When he wasn’t in bed, he was confined to a wheelchair. One sunny day his mother wheeled him out into the yard to get some fresh air. This day, instead of sitting there, he threw himself from the chair. He pulled himself across the grass, dragging his legs behind him.

He worked his way to the white picket fence bordering their lot. With great effort, he raised himself up on the fence. Then, stake by stake, he began dragging himself along the fence, resolved that he would walk. He started to do this every day until he wore a smooth path all around the yard beside the fence. There was nothing he wanted more than to develop life in those legs.

Ultimately through his daily massages, his iron persistence and his resolute determination, he did develop the ability to stand up, then to walk haltingly, then to walk by himself — and then — to run.

He began to walk to school, then to run to school, to run for the sheer joy of running Later in college he made the track team.

Still later in Madison Square Garden this young man who was not expected to survive, who would surely never walk, who could never hope to run — this determined young man, Dr. Glenn Cunningham, ran the world’s fastest mile**!

Story Told By Burt Dubin,

Developer of Speaking Success System.

•0n June 16, 1934, Glenn Cunningham ran the mile in 4:06.8 minutes, breaking the world’s record. His effort portrays that whatever you want to create in your life is yours for the making. As long as you desire it enough and allow your will to guide you, you can have and be whatever your heart desires. The only one that can put limits on our personal will is ourselves Develop and encourages your will to create and all the forces of nature within and without will help you bring your desire to pass.

The Pond having Milk!

          Once there was a king who told some of his workers to dig a pond. Once the pond was dug, the king made an announcement to his people saying that one person from each household has to bring a glass of milk during the night and pour it into the pond. So, the pond should be full of milk by the morning.

           After receiving the order, everyone went home. One man prepared to take the milk during the night. He thought that since everyone will bring milk, he could just hide a glass of water and pour inside the pond. Because it will be dark at night, no one will notice. So he quickly went and poured the water in the pond and came back.

           In the morning, the king came to visit the pond and to his surprise the pond was only filled with water! What has happened is that everyone was thinking like the other man that "I don't have to put the milk, someone else will do it."

The article can have so many different conclusions, here are a couple of them:

1- When it comes to help poor people, do not think that others will take care of it. Rather, it starts from you, if you don't do it, no one else will do it. So, change yourself to the way of God to serve him and that will make the difference.

2- Be honest in your actions regardless of thinking about others. Your honesty is related to your character.

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The Wooden Bowl : Impact of Parents on their Child.

           A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and a four-year old grandson. The old man’s hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather’s shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass often milk spilled on the tablecloth.

          The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. “We must do something about Grandfather,” said the son, I’ve had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor. So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather’s direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

          One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, “What are you making?” Just as sweetly, the boy responded, ‘Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow upon The four-year-old smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took grandfather’s hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

          Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes ever observe, their ears ever listen, and their minds ever process the messages they absorb. If they see us patiently provide a happy home atmosphere for family members, they will imitate that attitude for the rest of their lives. The wise parent realizes that every day those building blocks are being laid for the child’s future. Let us all be wise builders and role models. Take care of yourself, and those you love, today, and every day!

An Art of Happiness: Wonderful and Joyful Life

Photo of Gala Darling by Chloe

One of the toughest challenges to being a new parent is the realization of how little free time you actually have.

During the first few weeks of Ryan’s arrival at home, my day would consist of diaper changes, feeding, burping, breast pumping, holding, rocking, shushing – and the cycle repeats itself until my husband comes home. On many days, finding time for a shower becomes a challenge in itself.

And if I’m lucky, when he’s napping, I’ll have an hour or two to run to the bathroom, wash all my breast pump parts and get something to eat. On my most productive days, my accomplishments include getting the dishes done, or a trip to the grocery store.

This has been my life for the past six months. And what I described above is only a small portion of the challenges we’ve face. Other challenges include sleep deprivation, maintaining romantic relationships, and colic (3+ hours of non-stop crying every evening for several weeks).

What I realized is that we as a society really don’t give enough credit to the fulltime moms and dads in the world. It is really one of the toughest things one could experience, yet, it is one of those things we can’t anticipate or truly understand until we’re going through it.

Because my hands are constantly full (literally), I am behind on everything else, like cleaning the house, doing laundry, answering email and what feels like an endless list of action items.

Now that Ryan is a little bit older, whenever he is not eating or napping, I find myself putting him down on a playmat or swing, almost habitually, so I can catch up and get more things done. But in doing so, I wasn’t really participating with him when he was awake.

Ryan at 5 months. See more photos on facebook.

My mind felt noisy, cluttered and frazzled. I felt as if I was drowning in a sea of todos… ahhhh!!!!!!

One day a few weeks ago, as I was rushing to getting some work done on the computer, I heard Ryan making these ridiculously adorable sounds with his mouth as he lay on a blanket next to my desk.

I tried to ignore it, so I could finish what I was doing, but then in that moment, I realized that I was missing out on being with my baby and witnessing the precious developmental moments. I turned off the computer and started playing with Ryan with all my attention.

I realized that I had allowed the list of action items to dictate how I was living my life. I became so focused on getting things done, that I was no longer focused on being with my baby son, even though he is with me physically.

I realized that work will always be there, and that it is never ending if I allow it to be. I realized that my own happiness and spending time being with my family are the most important priorities. And now, I choose to be with my son, to give him my full attention, to witness the pure bliss that babies radiate. Everything else can wait.

It’s like when we’re busy being busy, we miss the beautiful details of our life, and we take for granted the things that mean the most to us.

If today was the last day of your life, would you be doing what you’ve been so busy trying to get done? Or would you be spending deliciously intimate time with the people you loved? Or doing something so satisfying for your soul that you know in your heart that life was meant to be joyful.

The Direct Route to Happiness

It’s easy to get caught up with the never ending todo lists, or the demands of other people wanting your time, or the guilt of things you think you “should” be doing.

But if we take a moment to slow down, to reflect, to clear our minds, we will realize that many of the things we do, and many of the things that seemingly cause us stress do not add any value to our wellbeing.

At the end of the day, ask yourself, “What do I want?” and the answer is likely a derivative of “I want to be happy.”

So instead of being busy, instead of doing, instead of rushing to get there, just decide to be happy, right Now!

Make the feeling of Joy and Happiness your primary focus as you walk through your day, regardless of what you are doing.

Focus on things that make you feel good. Focus on the goodness and blessings in your life. Look for things to be appreciative of, and mentally point out all that you are thankful for in any moment.

If you catch yourself feeling stressed out or overwhelmed, stop what you are doing and (optionally) close your eyes. Take a few deep breathes – fully inhale and slowly exhale – and ask yourself, “I want to feel good. What can I do right now to feel good?” and focus on feeling good and follow your inner voice.

The other day, I felt distracted and pressured, and then I asked myself what I wanted to do at that moment, and my inner voice said to play the song Sweet Lullaby by Deep Forest. For me, the song represents hope, inspiration and adventure.

I instantly felt upbeat and started dancing to its tunes in my office. A sense of relief washed over me physically and calmed my emotional being. I felt refreshed right away. In that moment, I came away with the following realization:

“Stop doing what you think you should be doing.

Do what you want to do, do what makes you feel good,

do what you feel inspired to do.

Remember that in your world, you make up the rules.

Stress is optional.”

~ Tina Su

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3 Useful Steps: Achieve Unclear to Pretty Clear Thoughts

Time and time again, I’ve watched coaching clients walk into my office stuck, in the fog of confusion about some situation in their lives. They are sure that they don’t know how to move forward, that they don’t know which next step to take.

We’ve all been there – in that uncertain, frustrating place. It’s no fun.

Time and time again I’ve watched those same clients walk out of my office having uncovered a clear, wise answer to their questions, a clear resolution to their dilemma, the kind that allows them to move forward with that wonderful sense of confidence and calm.

I certainly didn’t give them their answers – I don’t have them. They found the answers inside. We followed a simple process that cleared a space for their own answers to emerge.

This article is a guide to doing that process on your own. In 3 simple steps, you can shift from a state of confusion to mental clarity.

All of us have an ever-present, remarkable well of inner wisdom, there for us whenever we need it. The tricky part is learning to access it. Our inner guru speaks quietly. In the midst of busy lives and busy minds, it can be difficult to hear.

Here’s how to access the wealth of wisdom within us and overcome mental confusion, in three steps.

Step 1: Clear Confusion by Clearing Inner Clutter

Inner wisdom needs an open, quiet space to emerge. Problem is, our minds aren’t usually a quiet, open space.

They are typically cluttered with all kinds of stuff – fears, “shoulds”, and others’ opinions –and our minds are particularly cluttered with all of that when we are facing a difficult choice or navigating a challenging transition. That clutter drowns out the voice of our inner guidance system.

The first step to clearing confusion is to clear the mental clutter, which includes:

a. “Shoulds”

Ideas about what you “should” be doing, or things you want to do in an ideal situation. For example, how a “good” person (or a “good” mother, father, employee, friend, daughter, son etc.) would act in the situation.

When we take seriously or feel bound by ourselves, it becomes very difficult to decipher what we authentically want, what we truly value.

b. Fears

We’ve all had experiences when fear accurately warned us about a dangerous situation or person. But most of the time, our fears are irrational and over-reactive. They are about protecting our egos, not about protecting ourselves.

We’re plagued by fears that obscure the wisdom within — the fear of rejection or failure that keeps us from trying something new or going for our dreams; the fear of being unloved or being left out that causes us to censor ourselves and conform; the fear of the unknown that causes us to lead safe but unfulfilled lives.

These fears are like loud static that makes it hard to hear our inner voice, causing us to feel confused and distancing us away from the clarity within us all.

c. Inner Critic

We all have a critical inner voice that chatters away about how we don’t measure up. (In case you’ve been wondering if yours is pathological, you can relax. It’s normal. We are all hard-wired to have a tough inner critic.)

When we face a major decision that requires stepping up, taking risks, pursuing our dreams, telling difficult truths, being ourselves, that inner critic chatter tends to get louder, more frequent and more intrusive. It prevents us from hearing our own truth.

It needs to be cleared (or at least quieted down) for us to move away from confusion.

d. OPO – Other People’s Opinions

Then there are all those other people’s opinions echoing in your head: Your know parents will go through the roof if you quit the secure job and go for your passion. Your married friends will cheer if you get engaged, and be disappointed if you decide to wait.

You may also have internalised the attitudes of whole groups of people you are part of – your religious community, workplace, or extended family. There’s a whole darn crowd in your head!

Here’s the problem: it’s impossible to hear your own opinion, to sense where your inner guidance would lead you, with all those other people in your consciousness.

Your inner guide needs an open, empty space to emerge. It will come out when the one right person (that would be you) is listening.

e. Beliefs About What Isn’t Possible

Our inner guidance will often lead us toward creative solutions we would never consider if we were looking through our habitual lens of what’s possible or realistic.

For example, if you are sure that you can’t make a good salary doing something you are passionate about, you’ll be unable to hear any guidance from your inner wisdom that would give you ideas on how to do just that.

Clearing a space for inner guru, includes suspending –temporarily– your beliefs about what is and isn’t possible – to create a truly empty, open space, a blank canvas.

How to Clear the Mental Clutter

Take out a journal and write down all your mental clutter, downloading it from mind to page without editing: List all the “shoulds” you feel about the situation and any fears.

Write down the lines your inner critic is feeding you. Write down the other people’s opinions swarming in your mind. Write down all the things that is causing you confusion and anxiety. Make a list of any pertinent beliefs about what is or isn’t possible.

Then clear your mind of the clutter, using one of these simple tools:

• Close your eyes and take some deep breaths. Spend a few minutes letting go of any tension in your body. Then visualise emptying your mind of the clutter and confusion, one source a time. Use whatever imagery works for you. You might imagine a beautiful rain, washing it away; a candle burning it up; or a raft carrying it away on a peaceful lake.
• Let these pages you’ve been writing on symbolise the mental clutter. Physically move the paper to a different part of the house. Then return to the original room, to a space metaphorically free of all those polluting influences. Then continue with step 2.
• Give the clutter a send off. Close your eyes and imagine bundling up the clutter (the shoulds, fears, etc.) and taking it to a fun or beautiful place where it can rest without bothering you. Maybe you take all the clutter to your favourite beach, or a camping spot, or the mall. (Sounds hokey, I know, but it works.)

Step 2: Tap into Your Wisdom

Now, with a space cleared of confusion and mental clutter, tap into your inner wisdom. There are many ways to do this. Here are a few of my favourites:

a. Journal About the Big Questions:

• If I could have it any way I wanted, if anything was possible, what would I want?
• Deep down, what do I desire?
• What’s the truth of this situation?
• What next step am I being pulled toward?
• What feels right?

Explore what arises in answer to these questions, particularly any fragmented words, images or ideas that does not make sense at first.

The more foreign the answers seem, the more your inner guidance is taking you beyond what your conscious mind is yet aware of. That’s a good thing.

b. Check In with Your Gut Instinct and Your Body

Try on different decisions and notice how they feel in your body. What feels energising, and what feels draining? What feels like a strong “no” in your body, and what feels like a “yes”? What feels scary but right?

The answers have subtle effects on your body, take your time to relax, and then ask yourself the questions, and see the first gut instinct reaction out of you.

c. Be Playful Visually

Doodle, draw, paint, or make a collage in response to the questions above. See what the images tell you.

d. Ask the Future You

Imagine yourself ten years from now, a fulfilled older you. Step into that person’s shoes and journal from his or her perspective. How did you resolve the dilemma you face now? What advice would that self give you?

e. Time Travel

Close your eyes and travel backward in time to visit your childhood self in his or her favourite place. Spend some time with him or her, just playing. Then ask him or her,

• “What would you want me to know about this situation?”
• “What do you want here?”

If an “I don’t know” feeling persists as you use these tools, that’s just fine. Ask yourself, in a friendly and compassionate way, “What more do I need, in order to know?”

Use this clarifying question for all the other techniques above, if an “I don’t know” feeling emerges.

You may hear a clear “wait, just wait for now”, or you may hear “go get more information about x” or “you know the answer, you just need to face it.”

Step 3: Trust & Respect What Emerged

To move from confusion to clarity, it’s not enough to simply go inside, find the answers, and leave it at that. It matters what you do with the answers once you have them.

Here are a few guidelines for how to integrate your inner guru into your daily life, and what to do with that wisdom once you’ve tapped it.

a. Treat It With Love and Respect

How would you treat a person with whom you wanted to develop a deeper, closer relationship with? That’s how you should treat your inner guide.

How would you want to treat someone who has always been there to support and love you, no matter your capacity to love back? That’s how you should treat your inner voice. Treat it with love, appreciation and respect.

b. Trust

Though it’s difficult, try to trust whatever emerged from your inner voice, even if it doesn’t yet make sense to you.

Often, our inner guidance system is so far ahead of our conscious minds and present-day lives that its guidance feels surprising. Live with the guidance lovingly and patiently and see what emerges. Be open to hearing more, to coming to understand.

c. It’s Okay to Feel Scared or Resistance

Maybe your inner wisdom is directing you to make a major life change or make a choice other people won’t understand. It’s okay to struggle with the direction you’ve been given. It’s even normal.

d. Protect What You’ve Discovered

Don’t throw your pearls before swine. Don’t share new, still gestating ideas with people who are unlikely to be supportive.

e. Remember that You Don’t Have to Figure It All Out

Maybe your inner guide presented a vision of your future you have no idea how to create. Maybe it reignited your passion for a dream you don’t know how to realise.

You don’t have to know how to make it all happen. That part is not your job. You only have to trust, be open to more guidance, and take one step forward at a time.

Next time you are feeling confused and overwhelmed, take a moment to step out of your current situation, and follow the 3 steps above. It’ll get easier with practise: clear mental clutter, tap into your inner clarity, and trusting the answers that rise out of your inner clarity.

* What do you do when you are distracted by confusion and mental clutter? What do you re-gain clarity? Share your tips and stories in the comment section. See you there!

Share your thoughts and stories in the comment section. See you there! Before you go: please also share this story on Facebook, RT on Twitter . Follow us on Facebook and Twitter. Subscribe to receive email updates. Thank you for your support!

The ExtraOrdinary Ideas for Motivation of our Better self.

The ultimate guide to personal motivation. I like the sound of ultimate because it means final and implies it’s the only guide you’ll ever need. This should be the motivational guide to end all guides because that’s what lazy people need. Reading’s brilliant for entertainment or education yet it’s also a great escape and procrastination device but if you’re reading about personal motivation there’s something you want to achieve. You’re ready to stop procrastinating, spinning your wheels and being lazy because there’s something you want to get done.

What do you want to do or what should you be doing? Is it a long term task like writing your memoirs or something quick but unpleasant like booking a dental appointment or going to it? Why can’t you get motivated? Are you reluctant to vacuum and mop the floor because you know within six hours of completing the job a mob of hungry children will have sprinkled it evenly with bread and cookie crumbs then smeared mud and honey on top? Or is there something deeper holding you back like fear, lack of confidence or perfectionism?

It’s worth working out the answers to these questions for your own interest but in the end personal motivation still comes down to the old problem of getting started on something. I’m a lazy at heart yet I manage to achieve more than many other people do despite that. For example, I wrote over 130 articles for my blog over the last 15 months. I hope some of my tips will help kick start you into action.

Some people seem to have internal motivation which gets them moving and keeps them going when other people falter and fail to cross the start line. But you’re probably not like that or you wouldn’t need the ultimate guide to personal motivation would you?

Maybe you’re more like me. I respond well to deadlines, and although I sometimes start things well before they need to be completed, I never finish them until the last minute. I need a reason to do something. For example, if I need to lose weight it won’t happen unless I know that in four months I’ll be at a family reunion with aunties, uncles and cousins who haven’t seen me for five years.

You might tend to laziness and need a deadline, a carrot or a whip to get you in action but don’t despair, that doesn’t mean you’ll do any worse than someone with an internal drive to rival Bill Gates and his products. You can achieve just as much using external motivators to keep you on track.

If you’re a procrastinator and like to leave things until the last minute, you’ll just have to use a few tricks to get you going. Here are some that work for me:

1. Tell the world

Tell the world what you’re going to do. Announce it on Twitter, tell a friend, tell your boss, promise your cat. That should make you follow through.

2. Set a timer

How long does it take to clean the fridge, weed the front lawn or write a blog post if you put your mind to it? 20 minutes? An hour? Pick a reasonable time, set your alarm clock and go at it hammer and tongue until the bell rings.

3. Reward yourself

Of course everyone deserves to be rewarded for their hard work and no one should be a one-dimensional working machine. Promise yourself a small treat when the job’s done: a cup of tea, a quick call with a friend, a lie on the sofa with your eyes closed, or a walk.

4. Break big jobs down into small manageable chunks

All the above work best for short tasks. No lazy person could stay motivated to write an entire book but if you can work out a way to write 1000 words a day four days a week for a year then the book will have written itself.

5. Hang around with other motivated people.

Some people sap your energy, deplete your confidence, wear you down and depress you. Take note when it happens and avoid them or avoid talking about your pet project with them so they can’t deflate you.

6. Create an imaginary and urgent deadline.

Reporters and journalists thrive on deadlines. My friend Molly worked for Voice of America and she had to get out a report every hour on the hour. If she didn’t she’d be out of a job. Yes, it was stressful, especially at first but her writing got faster and better and she started to enjoy the challenge in the end.

Some of us aren’t lucky enough to be ruled by the iron fist of a stressed out newspaper editor, probably because we chose to work from home to get away from that type of office-based, fear-ruled work. But now we’re experiencing the joys of being our own boss and working for ourselves a deadline can still help. If there aren’t any, just make them up.

Pretend this is your last chance to make your business succeed and if it doesn’t happen at the end of a year you’ll have to go back to the office job you hated. Pretend that this one job is the last thing you’ll ever do, the thing that will leave a lasting impression, your final word. That’s what I did.

Imagining this was the last article I ever wrote created a sense of urgency and helped me get it down faster and without succumbing to the ever-increasing distractions around me.

No, it’s definitely not my last one. I’m on a roll now. Only 9.10 am and I’ve already got something down on paper. I’m going to have a ten-minute stretch now and then I’ll get back to it.

This time I’ll up the ante by promising myself I’m never eating again until the next job is done. I know it’s sad really but if you’re lazy like me you have to take desperate measures.

* How do you get yourself motivated when putting-it-off is an easier option? Share your thoughts with us in the comment section below. See you there!

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At Peace

A simple phrase, but sometimes it is very hard to maintain. Peace is a state of mind, of simply being. Somedays it is hard to reach that harmony with mind, body and spirit to simply be at peace. Think about it for a moment. For the mind not to worry or be stressed, the soul to be in complete harmony and your body not to feel unrest, now that it hard to attain, but it is attainable. You just have to figure out what works for you and what doesn't, that takes time and dedication for you to tune into yourself.

Usually it starts with something someone has tried and it works for them and they tell you about it, let's say a new diet plan. It is about acquired taste and if it is the right diet plan for your body. The same goes for a particular exercise that might work for someone else but not for your body. There could also be a certain type of relaxation exercise that works for someone but not for you.

Be at peace with who you are and what your capabilities are. Sure, you will constantly and consistently test those boundaries but you will come out feeling more content with who you are.

You can acquire peace just by knowing the right foods that agree with your body, the right exercise and the right relaxation methods that nurture your mind, body and spirit. You have to be willing to try new methods. Yoga might not work for you but maybe Tai Chi will. Be open and willing to try new things. You might find something that you really love doing.

When you reach the stage of peace and blissfulness, you will see in others how much they need it and how the unrest spills over to all areas of their life. You can only control you, but you can have a strong, inspiring and encouraging effect on others as well.

When you have reached a state of peacefulness within, you realize that moments are precious and you live them to the fullest without any regrets. You will realize that you are perfect, that reflection of you in the mirror is perfect and you accept it with any and all flaws that your mind dwells up. Sure, you can change your appearance, but it is what lies in your soul that makes up who you truly are. You can't change the world, but you can change you. Once that happens, you can see the world around you change, people and situations will change. You will see and act more clearly when you are at peace.

I am at total peace with death. When my time comes I hope that others rejoice in my life and not mourn my death. When others around me transition from life, I know how blessed I was to have them in my life and I would celebrate their life by rejoicing and remembering just how special they were to me. That feeling will never fade through time as they will always remain in my heart.

I am lucky and I am blessed, I acknowledge that every day when I awake in the morning. I appreciate all things great and small. I greet everyone with a smile. Life is too short to live otherwise. May you find and keep peace in who you are and in everything you do.

About the Author:

My name is Tami Principe; I created my website, http://www.WomensRecreation.com, to offer hope and encouragement to those in need. I am a Motivational Speaker, Author, Blogger, Radio Talk Show Host, and a Breast Cancer Survivor. I am the author of four books, "Walk in Peace," & "My Soulful Journey," & "The Wishing Well," and "The Green Rabbit."

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/9214913

Steps To A Wealthy Mindset

Victor E. Garcia

1. Redefine What Wealth Means for You.

Being "rich" simply is a term for many people. Technically, wealth or being wealthy is defined as having an abundance of resources or possessions. The high life does not equal wealth. Having a gigantic mortgage for a beautiful home or a huge car payment does not equal wealth.

Are status symbols your end goal? Does wealth for you mean that ability not to worry about bills or how much is left in your checking account at the end of the month? Does it mean providing comfortably for your family or being free from financial worry?

Does it mean the ability to afford luxury designer goods or getting a membership to the local country club? Being rich or being wealthy can also mean you enjoy a comfortable retirement. Maybe to you wealth means something totally different.

Your definition of wealth goes a long way towards setting your goals.

2. Learn To Hold Off Gratification

In today's culture everyone expects instant gratification, we all wants things NOW NOW NOW.

However, a wealthy person knows how to delay gratification and sacrifice the now for later. This often comes with a positive attitude towards work and wealth, such as: "If I invest now, I will make 30% more later."

The wealthy do not only think of now, they plan for the future. Long-term thinking over short-term. The present is merely an opportunity.

Change your mentality about spending. Do you really have to have that (place object here) now? The truly rich hold off gratification, knowing that what is trendy, popular or a must have today may not last until tomorrow.

3. Learn the difference between having a high income and being truly wealthy.

High incomes do not necessarily mean that you are rich, especially if this income comes from only one source.

The myth persists that you can only be truly wealthy if you come into family money or are born into a home of silver spoons, silk sheets and antique furniture. Continue to believe in this myth, and you still have the mindset of the broke.

Most people also believe that a high income job is the end-all of their problems and work their butts off to get to a position that pays in five or six digits but end up baffled at how little they have by the time retirement rolls around.

For example, the average high level manager earns $200,000 a year, with benefits but stands to lose that income in the event of layoffs or illness.

Although his income earning potential is high, it only comes from one source.

Contrast that with a middle level manager earning $50,000 a year. This middle manager, however, rents out properties in the city for another $500,000 and reaps dividends from stocks and bonds for another $100,000 a year. In the event of illness, death or mass layoffs, half of his earning potential is still secure.

The source of the latter's income is also easily passed on to future generations, securing wealth for the middle level manager's family.

4. If you're starting a business know when to hold off, reassess and quit.

Investors will say no to your idea, but not all of them.

Those with a poor mindset go to the bank for a loan, get rejected and never think about their idea or opportunity again. The wealthy mindset goes to the bank for a loan, gets rejected, redrafts the proposal and returns to get the approval.

The poor mindset goes into business not knowing the risks of the deal and is baffled when the fallout occurs. The wealthy mindset goes into a deal, knows the risk and gets out if things are going bad.

Always follow your gut and do your research. Know when to back off from risky or unethical deals will not only take your money but have effects of your freedom.

5. Use Your Subconscious to Manifest Your Financial Destiny

The wealthy know that before you can be physically wealthy, your mind must be thinking wealthy too.

Create dream posters by cutting out pictures of your dream status or quotes that inspire you.

Never underestimate the power of your will and mind.

Wealthy people never say they cannot do it, they think of ways so that they can. Instead of thinking "I can't afford that", think to yourself "HOW can I afford that?"

Write down 10 things you want when you're wealthy every morning right after you wake up. The key part is to write them in the present tense, "I have... ".

The act of physically writing this list and seeing your dreams in black and white will engrave your desires into your subconscious and motivate you to take action towards them every day.

The truly wealthy consider their mind as the foremost asset. They also tend to invest in their mind, especially when it comes to education. Visualize yourself to be the millionaire, entrepreneur and successful person you want to be.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Victor_E._Garcia

According To This World Bank's Report Gujarat And Andhra Pradesh Are India's Best Places For Business.

Gujarat, the state Prime Minister Narendra Modi ran for more than a decade, is India's best place for conducting business, the World Bank said on Monday, in a report that ranks the country's states in an effort to encourage them to cut red tape.

Gujarat: best place for conducting business

"The growth of business in India requires concerted action on several fronts - infrastructure, capital markets, trade facilitation and skills," said Onno Ruhl, the World Bank's India director. "The stark reality is that India remains a difficult place to do business."

The effort is part of the government's initiatives to improve India's position on the World Bank's 'Ease of Doing Business' ranking. India is 142nd on he list of 189 countries. The government wants India to breaking into the top 50 at the earliest. It expects to make it to the top 100 in the next ranking.  States were given six months to improve business environment based on 98 parameters in December, after the Department of Industrial Policy and Promotion (DIPP) got states on board for this initiative. DIPP then collected data on the steps implemented, asking 285 questions to all states and union territories in June this year. The information was reviewed by KPMG and World Bank for the final assessment of states.

Monday's report suggested that such steps as offering single-window clearances for administrative approvals, if followed by all states, could improve India's global ranking.

Reforms have changed how India does business 

It said that states -- including the top five, Gujarat, Andhra Pradesh, Jharkhand, Chhattisgarh and Madhya Pradesh -- had implemented reforms in online tax payments, construction, permits, electricity connections and environmental clearances in a specified time.

Rajasthan – sixth among 29 states

However, the states should set up electronic courts, and reforms relating to labour laws, land allotment and property registrations, the report said. "This is a defining moment for Rajasthan because improving our ease of doing business directly accelerates job creation for our youth," said Vasundhara Raje, the chief minister of Rajasthan. The state was ranked sixth among 29 states. Modi's government has taken several pro-business steps, such as rolling back plans to tax foreign companies and allowing them to invest more in insurance, defence, banks and other sectors.

Gujarat topped the list with a score of 71.14 percent

How are India's 32 states and union territories ranked?

The key parameters include:

1. Setting up of business

2. allotment of land

3. labour reforms 

4. procedure for environmental clearance.

The North East is at the bottom

Arunachal Pradesh fares the worst, followed by Nagaland, Meghalaya, Mizoram, Sikkim, Tripura and Assam. Then there's J&K, Andaman and Nicobar Islands, Chandigarh and Uttarakhand.

Punjab is best for setting up a business

Punjab leads all other business friendly states. "Remarkably, Punjab is the only State in which the single window system allows application for all of the licenses studied in this assessment, although some others come very close," the report says. 

Gujarat leads environmental procedure compliance

Gujarat scores a whopping 100% for environmental compliance, followed by Andhra Pradesh (85.19 percent score).

Jharkhand leads India's labour regulation compliance

"Jharkhand’s Labour Department is the only one in the country to score 100% on all four parameters studied in this assessment across all 7 processes. Andhra Pradesh also deserves a mention as the Labour Department provides clear information, timelines and online solutions, but lack downloadable and verifiable certificates," the report said

Maharashtra is best for securing infrastructure

infrastructure utilities are easiest sourced in Maharashtra (88.89%) followed by Gujarat (75%) 

Gujarat led business environmental inspections

Inspections under the Water Act and the Air Act saw Gujarat come out first. "The only other State that has implemented computerised risk assessment for environmental inspections is Maharashtra," the report said. 

Dispute resolution: Delhi and Maharashtra are doing something about it

"Only 2 States – Delhi and Maharashtra – have introduced specialized commercial courts, and only Gujarat has made available model contract templates and guidelines on the department website." The leader? Maharashtra  at 55.56%.

(Inputs from Reuters, The Economic Times and Kunal Anand)

Change in Season, Change in Routine

Adapting to change requires extra energy. With the carefree days of summer coming to an end and the fall season looming before us, children getting ready to return to school, people start to buckle down to prepare for winter - all this requires changes to our routine. Too much change can lead to negative stress and poor health. Think of yourself as a rechargeable battery with so much energy to spend at any given time. When the energy is used up, we have to recharge it by taking rest which restores our batteries. Regular routines require less energy and our batteries last longer. But when we have changes in our habits, we use extra energy called "adaptive" energy. Think about the time you moved into a new house. Things you used to take for granted, for example, the location of your vacuum cleaner or where to hang certain jackets or even where the light switches are, now require thought. We've all been there. What is easy in the old house requires thinking in the new.

When we have too much adapting to do at any one time, we can feel tired and get cranky. Perhaps you have just moved, changed jobs, and you have to get the children ready to return to school. We can feel uptight, stretched like a rubber band and lose our patience with others.

What can we do when we're too stretched? Here are three simple strategies for managing our way through a change in season requiring a change in routine.

Strategy #1: make a list of action items.

1. Brainstorm - a simple and easy strategy is to take out a piece of paper and write down everything you have to do in the upcoming week. I find doing this on a Sunday while looking at the week ahead works best for me.

2. Categories - next, list these action items into categories. That's all you have to do. You don't need to put a priority to your list or allocate time required to perform your actions. Just list them under your categories. For example:

Week of: September 12

Category #1: Meetings

1. Parent/Teacher

2. Doctor's appointment

3. Interview with George

Category #2: Personal

1. cardio class - 4 x

2. spa - fall tune up special

3. girl friends over

Category #3: Household

1. Clean out storage

2. Get bedroom painted

3. Prepare for BBQ

Category #4: Calls/Emails

1. Mom

2. Gail, Sue, Sarah

3. Business contacts

4. Workshop participants

3. Review - tape this list to the bulletin board, refrigerator, or place it in your day timer. Don't worry about when you're doing these things. The list will make you conscious of the actions required. At the end of the week, review how you did. You'll be amazed!

Strategy #2: Build in rest and repair. 

When we have too many demands on our time, we are in overdrive and the body is in the sympathetic state of alert. When we stay too long in the sympathetic alert state using too much energy, we burn out. Burning out leads to diminished health and wellbeing and we start a downward spiral leading to more stress.

The best way to prevent burnout is to do the opposite. Build in some gaps between activities and move in the direction of under-drive. How can you do this? Give yourself a break; go to the spa and have health and beauty treatments. Slow down. Close your eyes and relax. Have a reflexology treatment, for example. Reflexology is a natural healing art based on the principle that there are reflexes in the hands, feet, and ears that correspond to every part, gland and organ in the body. When having a reflexology treatment, the body naturally goes into the parasympathetic state of rest and repair where tension is relaxed, circulation is increased, and the body can normalize naturally. Be sure to get your nails done after the treatment - a great way to be forced into sitting and letting the circulation benefits get registered in the nervous system.

Too many demands and pressures, too often and too long, use us up until like the stretched out rubber band, we snap. Too little activity and too little stress with too few demands on us results in a dull system and like the unused rubber band that sits in our desk drawer for years, once taken out to use, it crumbles. We want Eustress which is a Greek word meaning good stress.

We all need some tension in our lives but we want healthy tension - just enough demands and pressures on our system followed by rest and repair is the way to stay healthy. Remember that stress is accumulative which means that the more stress we have, the more stress we tend to get. The same is true with rest and repair. We repair, recharge, and regenerate more quickly when our nervous systems are rested.

Strategy #3: Acknowledge yourself.

Most of us take our gifts and strengths for granted. Because of this, we often forget to acknowledge who we are and what we do to contribute to others. As we would acknowledge others, we should also see and acknowledge ourselves because we are important too. Take a moment and just acknowledge yourself and pat yourself on the back. You're OK, you know. In fact, you're great!

As we move from one season to another, demands and changes in our routines place constraints on our time and energy. Be sure to take care of yourself along the way. If you don't take care of yourself, there is only one end in sight. Poor health. Stay well. Be conscious of the demands on your time and energy. Build in rest and repair. And acknowledge yourself!

By Danielle Gault, Health & HR Development Specialist

RCRT, BA Psych. HRM Post-Grad.

Danielle Gault, writer, trainer, and natural healer, delivers workshops, coaching and healing services in Ontario, New York, and New Zealand. She has written articles published in the Ontario Association of Psychological Type, local newspapers, and for the Reflexology Association of Canada. Danielle believes in a holistic approach to living and uses personality theory, natural healing techniques such as yoga, reflexology and insightful workshops to assist people in addressing their issues in life and striving to live consciously. Her websites are: http://www.wellness-training-services.com or contact her at dgault@cwtservices.biz

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Danielle_R._Gault